Embracing Life's Banquet: A Journey of Gratitude and Growth

Hey, one more thing before you go. The show where we explore the stories, the moments, and the philosophies that shape our lives and the legacies we leave behind.Today's guest is someone who doesn't just talk about living in the moment. He embodies it. His life has been a tapestry of highs and lows, woven together by fearless commitment to presence, purpose, and possibility.He's a dreamer, a doer, and a believer in the power of saying, yes, I will, even when the world whispers, no, you can't. Guided by the ethos of and Auntie Mame's timeless quote, life's a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving to death.He's made it his mission to load up his plate and savor every bite and go back for seconds. His story is a masterclass in embracing consequences, chasing joy, and creating memories that matter.So whether you're standing at a crossroads, searching for inspiration, or simply craving a deeper connection to your own journey, this episode is an invitation to the banquet. Hi, Jim.

Hey, Mike.

How are you?

Great.

Welcome to one more thing before you go.

Thank you. I think that introduction was pretty amazing. I. I need you to write all my material going forward.

Happy to do it. Happy to do it. You know, it. It's.It's interesting when I'm doing a little background on you and kind of get to learning a little more about you and what you've done. That's what generated that introduction. So you've earned it. You've earned it all the way through. You and I have a couple things in common.One of them is we both had to redefine our purpose midlife. And I think that you've done it brilliantly.

Yeah. You know, it's. My whole life has been a series of redefining moments. Right. And I think I never was afraid.After I got through the first couple, it became a case of just keep doing it. You know, I came from a family where we didn't really have any roots. Right.My family was all in Pennsylvania, but my mom and dad left and headed west. So I grew up in sort of a family where you just didn't put down tip. Right. You moved on, you changed and adapted as you go. Right. So it's.It's been sort of my ethos that there's no reason you can't change things up. No reason you can't do something. If you do, you can.

I agree with that a thousand percent. I do have a question, though. Growing up in Pennsylvania. What part of Pennsylvania?

I didn't grow up In Pennsylvania. My family's in pen.

Your family from Pennsylvania?

Yeah, they're all from the Pittsburgh area.

Yeah, we have that in common also. My parents are from Pittsburgh. My father's from Pittsburgh.That whole side of the family, all the way back, way back in the 1700s, straight through, if we go that far back.

I have done some genealogy, and I find that the circles get close up in what was called Prussia. And I started to get anxious because I didn't want any kissing cousin knowledge.

Yeah, yeah. Don't. Don't want to go there. Don't want to go there. Well, let's begin at the foundation.What is it really like to live in the present, even when the moment's imperfect? Every philosophy starts with a first step, and yours begins with presence. I appreciate that because I have the same philosophy.We have to live in the present because life can change in instant, as we all know. And sometimes it's for the bad, sometimes.

It'S for the good, you know, so the. The reason this sort of became who I am really comes to conversations with my father where he would say, you know, I don't understand why you travel.I understand why you do all this stuff.And I really came down to saying to myself, you know, I want to do things in my life before I come to a point where I can't do them, because life is short and life changes. You don't know what tomorrow brings. So why put it off? Why not do it?It's something I talk to all my clients about in travel is when they say, well, maybe we'll do this next year, and go, what if next year is the year you can't do it? And I think Covid brought that home for a lot of folks. Finally, they sort of realized, gotta do things while you can.And I think even more so in this current world, things can change overnight, and you may not be able to go somewhere. So for me, even my career was that way. I took on things I never thought I would do. I didn't finish college.I did most all the way through an associate's degree and a couple years into my bachelor's before I got a job in it. And next thing you know, I was managing and running things that I knew enough about to be dangerous.But I have a good ability to learn on the fly and to sort of adapt and go, and I retain things. So that always paid off in my transitions. And so I learned a lot as I went along, and that serves me now.I'm in the biggest transition of my life right now.I've left the corporate world and have made this huge pivot out to be an entrepreneur, a podcaster, a travel advisor, and maybe not the best year to start being a travel advisor, given the current economics of the world, but I did it. I took that chance. And I always say to folks like, just try. Just really gotta try.

Well, what did in. From that perspective, what does presence like truly mean to you? What is that? Because you said we talked about being present in the moment and.And so forth. What does it mean to you?

So for me, it's. It's taking a second and listening to your heart, not always to your head. As humans, we, you know, tend to go to our heads a lot and get into the.All the numbers and facts and figures, but I think if you can listen to your heart, that brings you present. Getting to listen to your heart makes you a present individual.When I was in one of my career jobs, we actually learned all about being present in the moment.And I would walk into a room and I would stop at the door and take a big breath, look at everybody around, and then try to shut the noise off from whatever I just walked out of to start fresh. And those were always the best times and best meetings and best conversations because there's always a dialogue in our heads.There's always something going on.And being present means turning that off for a minute and listening to the fact that you steal your mind, you still your body, and you sort of get into just listening to yourself, listening to your heartbeat, listening to your breath. And in that moment, those moments, that's where I find the true self for me.

I think that you had a key factor there that I can share all the time. And I knew this from personal perspective as well as a professional perspective that how life can change in an instant.And I think that we all need to live in the moment and we all need to really understand that every moment is precious and that we really should take the time to enjoy it, to embrace them and to kind of move forward and try as best we can in a private, in a very positive way.Can you, can you share, like, a time when living in the moment led to unexpected joy for you, or maybe an unexpected consequence one way or the other, whether it was positive or negative.

You know, so there's two I'll share. I'm going to share the joy first, because I always feel like it's good to start at the positive.This past summer, I made a decision in the middle of the summer to go to my family's reunion. They have been for 72 years. They've been meeting every summer in Pennsylvania, in Wyoke, near Pittsburgh.And it's a park and they meet and they have all the different families come together and they bring food and it's a lovely celebration. It's a great way to see everybody at one time. And I lost my mom six years ago. I lost my dad this summer.So I thought, I'm going to make this journey because I want to see these folks, they're getting older. And so I got to see my uncle, my mom's brother, and my aunt and all my cousins and.And extended family was just wonderful and reminded me how important family really is. And again, not having roots, that wasn't common in my life. And literally within a couple of weeks coming home, my uncle died.And it was one of those moments, like I got to sit with him and talk to him and have dinner with him and laugh and just go back to the times that were really beautiful about knowing him. Right. The man always had a song in his heart, always whistled when he was happy. And that stuck with me.I walk around whistling and often think of him, you know, and it was just a great opportunity. It was a chance that, you know, if I hadn't made that, I would have regretted not having seen it. So. And then the one that brings me regret.It's sort of silly, but I had an opportunity when I was younger, living in California, to go see Frank Sinatra up in Reno. And I said, ah, he'll be there again. I'm not going to do it. And within a few months, Frank Sinatra died.I've always racked my head over that because I would have loved to seen that man perform. And it's just a regret that I didn't get to. And that sounds very trivial, but I'm a musician, I like to sing. I'm into that style music.It would have meant a lot to have seen him. And that has actually changed even now, more so when I say I want to see do or be somewhere, it puts more urgency on, you know, I don't like to wait.So it's. It's really. Those things impact you more than you realize sometimes.

Well, I think it's important and it's not trivial for something like that. We all have our idols, we all have the people we look up to.And I think, you know, having that personal connection with them, even in their presence in the audience and being that close to it and listening to it, not on a record, not on a cd, not on the radio, not on the tv. But in person, it makes it huge. Especially from a creative perspective.You know, you can embrace the music as it's created because we all know things. Things you put in a studio and it gets tweaked. We get done with this and I put it through a thing and I clean up all this stuff.

I know, right?

You know, so. So you got to hear it. You would have gotten to hear it straight, straight out.

So I. I respect that creativity out into you. Right. You're in that room to take that energy and feel it, which I love.

And that's. I felt that way about. When we get down to you about my story with Tony Curtis. That happened to me with Tony Curtis, it was like. It was.And I got, you know, he didn't die, but I got to meet him. And he was a hero of mine. I grew up watching his, you know, his stuff. So. Which, you know, what you mentioned about, you know, doing stuff.Now my wife and I have this conflict, and every time we go somewhere, she just wants to lay on a beach. And like in Maui, for example, lay on a beach, just relax, taking the sun. Okay. I kind of go.I either want to plan something or a spontaneity go, hey, why don't we do this today? And she's going, well, I was planning on laying on the beach. That's all I want to do is lay on the beach. How do.How does somebody balance, like, spontaneity? Like you. You mentioned that. Now you do it. How do you. How do you balance spontaneity with responsibility or. Or especially with a trip?

Yeah. So obviously, finances are my counterpoint to everything. Do I have money to enjoy it? Right. That's always gonna be the one.

That's all of us relationship.

You gotta negotiate. Right. You gotta talk about both sides of that equation. And there are times where I think you just have to go lay on the beach. I think it's okay.I think it's a good reminder for those of us who are go go goers is sometimes stopping puts you into presence. Right. It's a sudden moment to go say, oh, yeah, I forgot what it smells like to be here. I forgot what it feels like to be here.

Yeah.

And bring it back. And I think those are actually really beautiful times.

She. She's actually changed me from that perspective, I'm happy to say from. You know, I do, obviously, probably you probably figured this out.In my career in law enforcement, it was a. AAA personality. It was. It was like you just said earlier, go, go, go. It was do. Do Do. It was hard for me to shut down.It was hard for me to stop doing stuff because my mind was constantly. You're constantly on the move. You're constantly thinking.Even when you're off duty, you're looking at this, you're looking at that, you're watching people. You know, I called stuff in because I saw something going on. Hey, gotta this Intersect, go do this.So she's kind of melded me more into a balance like that now. So she has also evolved. So if we go someplace, we plan some things, but we leave some things open for spontaneity.

And I think that's a great balance. And I do. I do similar. I, I'm. I. I probably could have been a cop. I often think to myself, because I walk in a room, I don't want my back to anything.I want to see everything. I watch. I've been in scenarios where I've had to be quick, actionable, right? Because you see something going on. You know, I get out of here.This is not right. You know, and my friends always laugh because, like, how'd you never settle down? You're always just like, constantly surveying.I go, you know, I'd rather be safe than sorry. That's how I look at it. But I have learned to turn, to shut it off and find a switch to go off.I sometimes go too far the other way now, which is sort of the pendulum swings, and I shut it off, and it's like, I'll get on a cruise and. And it's three days and I haven't left the cabin. But that's okay because I'm really enjoying myself.

That's what life is about. Yeah, that's what life has to be about a lot. Enjoy.And no matter what we're doing, whether it's cruise, whether it's a vacation, or whether we're just with family, we need to relax, we need to enjoy ourselves, we need to have fun. So we talk about presence and journeys, if you don't mind. Like, for example, you chased a dream. If I looked at my notes, right.And have you always wanted to get more involved in the travel industry from a cruise perspective or from any kind of travel, actually.

So I often tell people, travel is really not about travel. It's. The travel business is about research. It's about learning and learning cultures, learning where things are, learning about stuff, where you go.I even in my last few years and corporate, it was working on events and things like that. So I was trying to, you know, explain my knowledge of being in those Spaces. Travel's a passion. I've just loved traveling. I love traveling.And I always say it's beyond the doors, beyond the gates.It's getting off of the vehicle and out and exploring the people, exploring the culture, exploring the food, and getting a chance to really partake in that and get to know where you're at. That's real important to me.So it was sort of a logical thing when this last job sort of came to an end to say, do I want to do corporate life again at nearing 60 years old, or do I want to do something where I get to be in charge? And, you know, I. I've always prided myself on sort of making good decisions, making good calls.I said, well, I think it's time to just go be my own boss. It's. This is done.I'm not gonna do this anymore with other people telling me what they want and, you know, decisions, not always being smart and just feeling like, you know, you're. Like. I said, you shouldn't do this. You probably shouldn't have. And when you find out you were right, you can't really say anything. So it's just.It was an opportunity to jump. Now, as I said, it's not necessarily been the best year to go into the world of travel.So I launched my business last summer, got the travel franchise purchased by the end of the year, and then something happened. And, you know, the economics of the country change and people's attitudes to the US have changed.And sadly, it's a little harder to get folks to cough money to go traveling because they're worried about their finances. So, you know, that'll change, that'll come back. And that's where my.My belief and perseverance is that travel will return again, because we were seeing travel already way beyond where it was pre Covid.So it'll come back and it'll turn into a great career when it's time, and it'll be something I can ride through sort of retirement without having to kill myself to do it.

You know, from that perspective, well, it's a risk. I mean, obviously, any. Any time we take an endeavor and we go forward with it, it's always have this risk. And it has its benefits in this regard.Unfortunately, with the current conditions across the world, I'm sure that there are some hesitations with going somewhere. And, you know, even with what used.

To be a trickle business where you'd get little, this is. And that's coming through that kind of sustained you. That's the part that's Dried up. There's big customers out there buying big travel. Right.So you know, I'll get. A customer wants to spend 25,000 instead of a customer spending 2500.

Right.

But you don't get a lot of $25,000 customers, you know.

Yeah. From that perspective. Yeah. You know, it, it's.My wife and I have thought about the same thing in, in regard to travel because the, without going deep into it. But you know, there is a fear, there is, there is an expectation that we watch the news, we watch what's going on. My sister went to Spain.My sister, my brother in law just recently went to Spain and Italy. So they went, they went on a, a Viking cruise that went kind of around the different ports and then ended up in Spain.And when they got into Spain in Barcelona there, and I'm sure you've seen this on the news, you know, they were yelling at people and sparing them with water and get out of here and leave. And just. It was really disheartening. And she said that she didn't have any issues when they were in, in Italy.She had me issues going all around the real Italian part of it. When it got to Spain, it kind of, it kind of really put a sour note on the whole trip, unfortunately.

Yeah. You know, I think that's the thing. There's always gonna be something somewhere. Right. That's how I look at it.There's always gonna be something to be aware. I always advise my clients to sort of, you know, know what they're getting into because it's important.

Yeah.

You know, we probably. Nobody could have predicted Barcelona would act that way. It's just been a thing. But there is a pushback, especially on cruise lines.I think that, you know, these, these ships come in and this is the challenge. I find sometimes they come in with thousands of people and more and more they're buying their own private spaces instead of their private activities.They don't really help that economy. And I think that's why get out beyond the gates, get out beyond the doors. Because if you don't, you're just feeding the cruise lines. Economics.You're not necessarily feeding the country.

The country part of it. Yeah, that makes sense. Well, hopefully. I mean, you're chasing this dream. I would love to chase the same dream, to be honest with you.My wife and I love to travel. So I mean, I understand. We, from our perspective, it's. You get to, you get to touch history.I mean, yeah, yes, the United States is as old as we are, but when you Go so much, so much deeper. You know, thousands of years of history that you get to walk in, you get to touch, you get to walk the same path.You know, you get to feel this, you get to be in the presence of this. As you can see, I get really. I get excited about that from that perspective. So. But, you know, we have to also be careful because it's. I'm. I'm.I. I'm a little older now, too, and, you know, I have to be careful with. With where we go, where we walk now and this kind of a thing because I don't want to screw up where they rebuilt me.

Yeah, well, heck, I have to be careful where I walk these days.

Yes, It's. It's, you know, getting. Getting to this age of wisdom we'll call it. Yep. We never anticipated, like, wait a minute. It's not supposed to be like this.The golden years are supposed to be a little more.

Let me say, by the time you have the knowledge and resources to go explore the world, you're getting old enough, you can't explore it.

Yeah, that's it. That's it. That's. That is the answer. That is the answer.So in regard to this, you still believe from a life perspective, if I can ask, because one more thing before you go.We're about life and life experiences, and from a life perspective, do you think that this decision for you to chase your dream this, this way, do you think has changed your life forever?

Well, you know, a year ago, would I thought I'd be a podcast host? Would I have thought I'd be running a podcast when I thought I'd be booking travel for people?Would I have thought I'd go to the places I've gone, even when I don't really have a lot of money sitting in the bank when I'm making it work? Right. No. It's changed my life dramatically. It's like. And it's good stuff. It's fun stuff. This. This is a whole new me that I've never gotten to do.And what I will say is I'm happier, I'm more alive. My stresses are completely different than they used to be. And that it, to me, is the sign that I'm doing something right.I'm not stressed about things. I probably should be, but I'm not. I'm not stressed about making somebody else happy, although I like to make my customers happy. And I'm.I get up every morning and it's sort of like, what's today gonna bring? What's today's adventure. What do I get to work on? You know, and I look through and I get client ask for something and I'll go dig around.It's, it's just a different experience and I'm loving it and I'm, I'm, I'm cherishing it and taking it in every moment. And started the podcast.Life in the baggage claim was sort of a realizing that I, I needed to get myself a visibility because there is no brick and mortar travel anymore.And when I reached out to the person who was my co host, Chuck Longer Beam, we had both gone to travel school together, so to speak, and knew each other, liked each other, I said, do you want to do this with me? And he's like, sure. And next thing you know, we were doing a podcast and I don't think either of us knew what would happen.We didn't know whether we do it or fall flat on our faces. And we've had reasonably good acceptance and we're loving it, but we're not doing it because we're trying to get a sponsor or build viewers.We wanted a place to just express creativity in our thoughts. And funny enough, when I turned AI on our podcast and said, what is this thing?It came up similar to what you mentioned in the beginning, but it also said something like, chuck and Jim must be lifetime friends because they know each other really well. And we both laughed because it's like you didn't know. We only knew each other weeks, months.But it's showed that obviously we had a connection and that was a good thing. So, yeah, it's been life changing, it's been fun, it's been the stresses. Don't worry me. It will all work out as how I look at it.

That's brilliant, actually. And, you know, we just, you have soulmates out there. Soulmate doesn't have to be somebody like, you know, you meet and you fall in love.A soulmate can be friends that you have that just. You connect and that's the way it goes. Yeah, 100%.

Yeah. You know what? It's, it's kind of fun. We are both very different, which is sort of the fun part.We have a little bit of different beliefs and different systems we grew up with, which is awesome.So it kind of proves to me the thing I love most, which is when people get together and get to know each other, they find more about what's in common and different and the media. Right. The talking heads and all what have us believe that everything's about how we're different. It's not. And the Americans are great at this.When Americans get together and talk, they actually find what they like. They find each other. And so I encourage people to get out there and talk to folks, you know, don't, don't just take the opinion.

From t. You know, I think that the world, the world of the computer in our hand and not having real conversations unfortunately has dissipated to a point that it, it's. They forget how to have a conversation. They forget to have personal interaction.They forget the value of doing what you and I are doing right now where we're having a face to face conversation. And yes, we're across the country, but we're still having a face to face conversation.

And we don't, you know, people forget how to argue and disagree. It's, you know, like I always say, I grew up in a family where you'd sit around for dinner and have know a political discussion, right.And my dad and my grandmother were politically discussed all the time. There were things going on and.But the end of the night you knew you were loved, you knew you were cared for and when you went to bed, you didn't hate anybody. You knew you'd see, you'd say I love you and I'll see you tomorrow. And I think people need to figure out how to get back to that. I really do.And this is something we've talked about on the podcast is that's something's missing. There's a whole lack of that impact ability in our world world, right. For people to disagree and be constructive in their disagreement.

Well, I think it's because they've lost the art of communication.

Yeah, absolutely.

Unfortunately. And look, I am glued to my phone, so I'm guilty of that as well, but because it's convenient, you know what I mean?If you need to look up something, you need to get something, you need to have you communicate for a different way or quickly. But I also understand that we need that aspect of it as well because you can quickly text somebody, say, hey, are you okay? Hi, how are you doing?You know, checking in on somebody like this. But I prefer and it called me old fashioned. But you, I know that you agree because you just said it.I, I think that the face to face, the one on one D, the interpersonal communication when you do it this way gives us a better understanding if we as human beings need this to be able to kind of have a positive effect on our lives, to really get to know your neighbor, get to know the people in your neighborhood. So yeah, I agree with That I.

Always say a text message is great. I love when someone just texts to say hi. I think it's even the step further is call somebody once, call somebody, get on a video call.Because we are devolving in our ability to be around each other. And I don't want to be this just text and grunt and groan society. Right.And I want to be able to say, hey, I'll meet you for coffee, or hey, let's get online and have coffee together. You know, you don't be in my city, let's see each other. Because more, we are human beings are expressive. Right.We, our faces say it, our bodies say it. Everything about us talks. But what we hear and what we see don't get connected when you don't have that visual presence.

I agree. I agree with that. It's easy. You can do it with zoom. You can do it with what we're doing right now. It just makes it a lot easier.I think that, that that's part of your Yes, I will mindset that you.

Well, and it's the one thing where I say technology has done something great for us. It's given us the ability in our hands to pick up a call and put you on face. And I can speak.

Yeah.

And I know how you're doing. But I think back to being a kid, you know, and we have an earthquake in California and Grandma's calling from Pittsburgh. Are you okay?And that earthquake happened hours ago. But she's just seen it on the news. Right. If we were in trouble by now, things would be bad.

Things would be bad.

Now we get everything instantaneous. It's kind of odd.

We're living Star Trek.

Yes.

We're living Stark.

Very known something, right?

Exactly. Exactly. Maybe his travel may have gone a little farther than, you know, he may.

Have followed that silver cord, that Shirley MacLean light out there somewhere.

That's it. Yeah, that's it. It figured it all out. Figured it all out. Well, I appreciate the mindset.I think the Yes, I will mindset as a, as a, you know, if I work with it, I understand it and I believe in it because as I mentioned to you earlier, my audience knows, my community knows. You know, if I would not have said, yes, I will walk my daughter down the aisle, I would.I would still be sitting in a wheelchair feeling sorry for myself, and my daughter would have walked down the aisle by herself or had to roll with me or push me down the aisle, which, you know, is not good for both of us. So, yes, I will mindset.I think Is a wonderful opportunity for us to be able to get rid of the fear, get rid of the doubt, and, you know, kind of move forward in a positive way to benefit us and others around us.

Yeah. I used to say at work when someone would say something, I mean, that's kinda hard. I would never say, no, I can't do it. Right.It was the kind of, yeah, I can do it, but I don't know if I can get to this part that you want. Right. It's like this thing. Maybe it still puts the positive yes out there, but gives you that opportunity to have a little, you know, wiggle room.Right. So I don't really like the yes, but. But it works, you know, the yes and is always nicer. But finding ways to say, I can do it.I will work on how I get all the way to what you want.

Let's step back and look at the bigger picture of the philosophy that guide you. The banquet of life. I think that I love that you've embraced the anti maim ethos that you had come up. How did you come up with the anti ethos?

Oh, my gosh. So this goes back to early 90s.I was changing jobs and I had a good friend who worked for Nestle Beverage company and he got me a job working, working there. And he had a lot of influence on my life in terms of just how I looked at work and did things. It was really wonderful.But he got that movie on a video one night and let's watch it. And I never laughed so hard at the conversations and the. It was such a great movie. I still watch it usually every year for Christmas.When you think about the age and the times and just the fact that it was when it was set in the 20s and 30s and 40s era, the, the. The sets are amazing, the costumes are great, the color is vivid, but the lines, the dialogue, the script is so crazy and it's fast.Rosalind Russell could deliver lines like no one ever could.And that line is used in the end when she comes out and tells her her grandson, you know, I'm gonna, you know, life's a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death. And I just said, wow, that resonates because there is so much to do in this world.You should never find yourself at a moment of boredom or not knowing what to do. There is so much to explore, so much to see. And that was Auntie Mame's world. She went out and explored and did things and explored the world.And that was, you know, it Was just a thing that stuck with me in my own passions. So she became my, you know, iconic cultural hero.

This works. Do you think that that helped you to connect, like a legacy and meaning. Meaning in life and how we should.

Approach it, like is more.

Life is more. Exactly.I think that a lot of us get stuck in the nine to five, you know, get up, get your coffee, go to work, sit at a desk all day, do your job, drive home in horrendous traffic.

Yep.

Sit down, eat dinner, watch little tv, go to bed, get him, do it all over again.

Yeah. And then you. The time frame, the era of that movie. Right. This was the great Depression. It was post depression.And I think it just showed me that there was a way to make something out of anything. There's a way to make life good, whether you have abundance or scarcity, There's a way to find the abundance in life.If you don't have money because there's emotions and there's love and there's care, there's a way to find ways through any time of scarcity, you can make it work.

Well, that goes back to gratitude. I mean, and we talk. I've talked about that over the last six years.I've talked about gratitude and how important it is to have gratitude, even for the little things in life.

Yes, absolutely.

You know, and so I know cop. As a cop, you know, I saw people at the worst. I saw the best people at the worst.I've walked into situations that are unbelievable, that most people would have, you know, been appalled and turned around and walked away.And within that, even within that, you would find people desperately trying to find purpose and desperately trying to find something to be thankful for. So getting somebody even out of some situation like that, it was like they hit the jackpot. It was. It was the world to them.So I've always been a big believer in. In gratitude, in.

I'll share a gratitude story with you, Michael, that you'll love. While I was working at Salesforce, I became the angriest white man you've ever met. It was terrible. I mean, I. I just.I carry a chip on my shoulder, and I don't know why, but these two wonderful ladies that I worked with pulled me aside one day and said, hey, Jim, why are you so angry? What's wrong with you? You're a great guy, but you're just angry, and it's not you.And it hit me like a ton of bricks because I didn't know I was being that angry. And it was one of those moments. That became a pivot.And at the time it was be a big thing in, in the public to do these seven days and ten days of gratitude. I says, you know what I'm going to do? 365 days of gratitude.And so every day I was going to post into my journal something I was thankful for and onto social media what I was thankful for to just sort of show what things were good in life. And it was a transformational moment. It pivoted me into a very good space. I became more aware, presence became part of my life.Gratitude became part of my life. Happiness and joy returned and I really fully embraced then the pivots the times to move forward.And I've told these ladies several times they didn't realize that saying something as simple as you're angry that day would change my life so much. And nowadays when, I mean I, I went 365 days posting something you're thankful for makes you really dive internally and look.And so nowadays when I get angry or get upset or feel like the world's not a great place, I remind myself of some of the stuff. And what I love is the journal program. I have pull stuff up and remind you too.I learned a little bit about patterns on myself and other stuff that really has helped me move forward. But it changed me and it put gratitude front and center for the rest of my life.No matter who or what, if someone does something for you, if someone crosses your path, when people come into your life, think about why they're there. Be grateful that they are.

That's profound actually. You know, it's one of these things that you don't know what somebody else is going through in their daytime. You don't know what they've been through.You don't know when something had just happened. You don't know anything about them. And even a nice hello, how are you doing?

Oh my gosh.

A profound effect on somebody. Recognizing them so they don't feel like they're not visible is even something that's important.

I think it goes back to reading the room, right. It's like being smart enough to look around and see what you see. And sometimes you're saying to someone, are you okay? What can I do for you can.

Change everything, you know, everything for somebody change their day. You find that and, and I, I, I know this from personal perspective. That in itself has the opportunity to save somebody's life.

It does, it does. And I had one or two people tell me because you said hello and invited me into your life. It changed mine. And I was on a path.And I think to myself, wow. I mean, when someone tells you that, that's. That's a lot. It's a lot of weight, right? To suddenly realize that you can do these things.And I think that's the power of human beings that we don't embrace. We have so much within us to be so strong and so encouraging and change the world in such a simple.

Way the way it needs to be. Yeah, I agree. But the question resolves, was Auntie Mame before or after the girls, the two women?

Oh, before. Well before. Well before, which is interesting. So the seeds have been planted for a long time. I find I learned how to nourish them and make them grow.

So she.Auntie Mame influenced your decisions about your relationships and your work and your creative work, and the two young ladies just kind of nudged you.

They gave me the catalyst to finally get it going right. And, you know, that's been a lot of my life. I find that when someone nudges me, I really listen to these days, you know, I'm.I'm a relatively spiritual guy. I believe in a higher power. And when that stuff happens, I sort of say, stop. Listen to it.

Yeah.

Hear what your body's telling you. There's a book I read said, you know, let your life speak is the name of the book, and it's a great book about just listening to you and who you are.Just says where you should go.

And that in itself is also profound. We don't take the time to listen to ourselves. I think that that's getting lost somewhere in the universe that we need to really agree with.

We're gonna take a pill, put a band aid, get through it kind of world. Right. And I think that I. I embraced counseling early in my life because I felt it was important to sort of understand myself. I.A lot of want to learn things, so, you know, when I was making decisions about religion, I wanted to learn about every religion. What was it like? When was it out? You know?And I don't want to just take a pill to make the world better, so I want to understand what's going on with me that's making me need the bill. Right.

We have. We have a lot more in common than you think. I did the same thing.It's, you know, instead of just one religion, I experience a number of religions, so I can understand the different perspectives and kind of. I grew up that way, you know, and. And it gave me a broader vision of people.

And, yeah, I don't hate people because of their religion. No, I disagree. But I don't necessarily have to hate, you know. And that's the thing.I feel like if people took the time to learn and this is where travel comes back in. Go experience that. Go experience something that you wouldn't normally do. You're going to come home a better person.You won't be as angry with those folks that you think are all bad.

Absolutely. Because if life is a banquet, then we have to embrace that banquet. Right, Right.

There's Indian food, there's going to be pasta, there's going to be salad, you know, and dessert. And dessert.

Don't forget about dessert.

It may not be the dessert you think is best.

That's true. But then again, it may surprise you enough to say, hey, this is really good.

Exactly.

So it kind of works. So what's currently on your plate and what are you going back for?

So, you know, I never can get enough travel and cruising. Cruising is my go to now. I sell everything. Right. I sell land, crew, vacations, I sell tours, everything else. But cruising is my safe space.That's where I love to go. Because I as a, I'm a Leo, I'm a fire sign. But I love my water. I need to go to the ocean. And then growing up in California, that was part of life.I need to get that, that recharge of those salt airs and all that. Right. It really gets me back on place. This cruising really puts my body back into balance and getting in the water is a big deal and just love it.Right. So. And cruising allows me to go do taste testing of all kinds of cultures and countries. That's sort of.Then I can go back somewhere while I'm really down for that. So I'm gonna continue cruising. I.A year from now I will be just getting home from a 17 night LA to Miami Panama Canal cruise that I'm bringing people along with me on. That should be fun. That'll be my second time through the canal and it's on an all adult cruise line, so no kids.

Cool. Cool.

And it's not that I don't like kids. I just don't like unruly other people's kids.

I agree with you in that respect. Yes, yes.

So. And it'll be on Virgin Cruise Line. That's my Virgin Voyages is my. It's like my spirit ship.

Very cool. You need a spirit ship. A spirit ship.Not the kind that looks like the pirates from this, you know, but the good spirit ship, the ghost ship I guess would be a Better idea.

Yeah. I'm working on some, Some travel for some groups. That's kind of been fun.I like that because I get them doing some stuff to just get them information, research on some big tours. So it's going to be. I think it's going to be a good year this next.

That sounds like a good year.Well, let's talk about your, your cruises in your opportunity and how you help people to understand the value of culture and traveling and enjoying life.

So, you know, I, I often get asked, like, why, why would I use a travel advisor? Right. And I get that question because everybody thought in the 90s, when the Internet became a thing, that you didn't need a travel advisor.But I would say that post Covid travel is more complicated. Getting everything to align and come together is never easy.Your travel advisor's job is to help make your dreams come true with the least amount of friction and stress possible. So when someone comes to me, it's an opportunity for me to go explore and in my mind, even just take that trip and see what it's like.And I love exploring it and figuring out things for my customers. I love seeing where they want to go and how I can make that come to reality.So over this next year, the big goal is to have a couple cruises that will be aligned with life in the baggage claim. We'll say to our listeners, come join us, maybe meet some of our guests that we've had.But otherwise it's going to be, you know, I'm really focusing on trying to get some affinity groups together to get their travel going. I've got a garden club I'm working with with and potentially a flamenco troop.But I sell everything, and I love working with folks who are ready for something different and they're looking. Maybe they haven't done a big vacation in a while and they want to know where to go and what to do.You know, I, I love the process of getting to know my customer and getting to understand their.What drives them and gets them excited, where they want to see and why they want to see it, and then helping them again get beyond the gates and the walls. Right?So I always say, if you go, for instance, to a lot of the Caribbean islands and you get off the ship, the first thing you're in with is a pool and a bar and a place to eat. And it's all within the confines of a compound that is run by cruise companies. It's not the country you're in.You got to go out beyond the gate to where things are maybe a little dirtier and grittier to really experience a country. And I encourage people who work with me on travel to get out and explore the culture there it go, the beach like you're a native.Go eat like you're a native. Go walk around and be confident that you're going to be okay. Like you live there.And you will find that most people are friendly, most people actually don't mind Americans. They don't hate us like we're told sometimes.And they welcome us and put some money in a local store's pockets, buy some beer at a local restaurant, have some food at a local restaurant. You're not going to die, you're not going to get sick. You know, it's a very rare thing.Maybe don't drink the water out of that spare, but just get beyond where you land, right? If you're going to an all inclusive resort and you stay in the resort the whole time, you didn't see that country, you saw that resort.So just, you know, make a chance to get out and see things. So my company, I'm franchised with a company called Cruise Planners. My company's called JP Hou Adventures.It's@jpalkadventures.com and you know, I can, I, I sell everything.That's one joy of being a franchisee is that I can sell cruises, I can sell land tours, I can sell excursions, I can get you on your flights, I can get you your car.And, and I love kind of learning what a customer likes from a sense of how they like to travel so that I can sort of put together the perfect package. So, you know, you want to go travel like a rock star and be treated to VIP service everywhere. I'll make it happen.You want to go to an eco tour where you give back and you go work for a school or you go do cleaning on a beach or something like that. I can make it happen. I got connections all around the world that I can work with.And there's really no trip you would want to do that I can't help you get into.

Sounds like a wonderful opportunity for us to be able to get to understand whether you're just starting out in cruising or just starting out with your trip across the country or across the world that you help all aspects of, whether you're a seasoned traveler or a beginner traveler.

Yeah, exactly. And, and don't ever worry about it. Just, just let your. That's where a travel advisor. I'm always saying I'm here to sell you a dream.But I'm also here to be your garden angel while you're on your dream. Right.

Yeah, I think we need that especially. Yeah, I think we need that. Well, thank you for everything. I really appreciate you being here. I think we've.There's been a great conversation, and I have enjoyed learning a little bit more myself in regard to traveling. So I appreciate you being here.

Thank you for having me. This is always fun.

I will make sure that there's links in the show notes and everything to find you so they know how to get there and get connected with you. Um, but this is one more thing before you go.So before we go, I. I would like to ask you, what legacy do you hope to leave behind for those who hear your story today?

So, first and foremost, I believe you need to leave the world a better place than you came in. So that's important to me. But if there's anything I can leave somebody listening to this is don't wait till tomorrow. Go do it today.

Those are brilliant words of wisdom. Life can change in an instant. Take advantage and take advantage. Well, again, Jim, it's been a pleasure meeting you.It's been a pleasure having a conversation with you. I look forward to eventually, one day possibly calling you up and getting on a cruise with my wife.

Still, you know, I've got an answer for you. So when you're ready, we'll talk. Well, put on a river cruise. That way you're not worried about deep water.

Oh, yeah, yeah, I never thought about that. Yeah, Old Navy, guys. All I thought was the ocean, right? Well, that's. That's brilliant. I will be in touch. But thank you very much for being here.I really appreciate your time and your effort and your conversation.

Absolutely.

As Auntie Mame reminds us, life is a banquet. And today's conversation has been feast of wisdom, presence and gratitude.So thank you for sharing your journey, your philosophy, and your invitation to live boldly to our listeners. You carry these insights with you on your lives, travels. Say yes a little more often. Savor every moment at your own banquet.And until next time, one more thing before you all go. Have a great day. Have a great week, and thank you for being part of this community.Thanks for listening to this episode of One More Thing before youe Go. Check out our website@beforeyougop podcast.com.

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